thirty niiiiiiine

(sorry about the dirty mirror)

Here we are at 39 weeks! Pretty big, right?

My mom made it in last night, and we’ve been lounging all day, waiting for this girl to make her appearance (come soon, please!!!!!!)

I can now cross swelling off the list of things I haven’t experienced during this pregnancy.
My feet are basically swallowing my toes.

Ok, I’m off to walk around the block or something.
This waiting stuff is not fun anymore.

 ♥ kP

38 Weeks!

Since I’m nearing the end of this pregnancy (hallelujah!), I thought it would be fun to share some common symptoms that I haven’t experienced. (I know there’s still time… ha!)

*mood swings
*weird food cravings
*vomiting (I threw up once during my first trimester, but that was during the worst migraine of my life, when I literally thought I was going to die).

Weird, huh? I didn’t think there was any way to escape those things.
I’ve had my share of uniqueness, though (almost dying of dehydration…remember that?).


I’ve been pulling out my craft supplies a lot more lately.
Every girl needs a cute doll, right?
(I took this pic before I fixed her hair).
My mom is coming in less than a week! I’m soooooo excited. I’ve practically been by myself for the past few months, so I’m extra excited for some human interaction. Plus it’s my mom! I can’t wait! Every day I try to convince BP to come the day after my mom gets here. We’ll see if she follows through with the plan.
In honor of BP’s birth, I’m going to eat enchiladas every day after she comes. I’m prepping to have a year’s supply in the freezer so that I can eat them whenever. I. want. Oh what a lovely thought! In fact, maybe her first year should be mexican-themed. Nachos! Burritos! Enchiladas! ohmygoodness. (Clearly I just got a package from America with my favorite Mexican ingredients).

Friends and Family: Since we live so far away from you guys, you can expect your instagram feed to be full of BP once she arrives. Just thought I’d let you know so you can get excited and/or unsubscribe. It’s going to be nuts. The blog will also have a healthy dose of the babe, don’t you worry.

I thought I would be really scared, or at least nervous, about labor and delivery, but honestly, I’ve had so much time to process and imagine scenarios that I feel pretty confident. Of course there are always nagging “what-if’s”, but I just keep reminding myself that this girl is going to be here soon, and that’s all that matters.

I am definitely ready for her to come.

♥ kP

36 Weeks!

It totally looks like I just stuffed something under my shirt, doesn’t it?
I assure you: that belly is real. Very real.

This week is pretty anticlimactic because I thought I was 36 weeks last week. Sad!
I’m glad I’ve been able to keep this babe inside for so long. I know when 37 weeks rolls around, I will
be completely relieved. It’s completely draining to worry about a person you can’t see for so long! (I need to learn not to worry at all).

The big news this week is that we have to change doctors and hospitals. At first I was soooo upset about it, but now I think it’s probably for the best. My (awesome, amazing, incredible) doctor decided to finally research some of my health problems, which caused her to freak out and panic and decide that I need to go to a more experienced doctor (I think she’s overreacting, but I understand). In a very extreme situation I could stop breathing or my heart could stop during delivery (or any physical activity, actually). Pretty crazy, right? Anyway, I started crying in her office because I was shocked and so disappointed. I love, love, love that hospital. It’s so peaceful and everyone is incredible. It felt like a dream every time I went (who says that about a hospital?). I know the new place will probably be great, too, but I am still disappointed to have to change at this point in my pregnancy. The other devastating thing is that I have to change to a male doctor, which shouldn’t be such a big deal, but for me it is. A huge deal. My mom assures me that when I’m in labor, I won’t care, but I think I really will. I’m glad I still have a few weeks to get over it. G is definitely most important in all of this.

I’m nervous to keep mentioning how well I feel these days. I’m not very uncomfortable, and I’m sleeping really, really well. I think most of it has to do with how long-waisted I am. Sometimes I even wake up in a panic because I don’t “feel” pregnant. I honestly ask myself, “am I still pregnant?” I guess I’m getting used to this huge belly. I didn’t think that was possible. I’m definitely ready for this girl to come out, but I’m surprised by how easy this last trimester has been.

Yesterday morning, while we were still in bed, Husband said, “I can’t wait till G’s old enough to make us some pancakes.” We laughed, and then I reminded him that she’s my girl, which means she will probably get really excited, make a HUGE mess, and then scream from the kitchen, “DADDY! THERE’S A FIRE!!” We both laughed because it’s so true. I really hope she inherits cleanliness and responsibility from her Papa. For real.

My mom sent a bunch of my (and my sister’s) baby clothes. How cute is that purple velour track suit? I can’t wait to see G as a retro 80s baby.

Remember this elephant? My mom and I fell in love with these stuffed animals when we first discovered them. She decided that she wanted to buy one for each of our future kids. I told her to buy at least 4. She bought 5 (“It’s a purple horse with a ribbon mane! It’s ribbon!”) She can’t be stopped. The plan was to stock up and then give them to the grandkids one by one, as they come, but she couldn’t stand the thought of them waiting in a closet. So G gets them all. I hope she likes to share.

They are super-cute, aren’t they? I love stuffed animals with amazing personalities.
It feels like Christmas over here as we wait in anticipation for this little babe to come.
Every night Husband and I look at each other and smile huge smiles. 
We’re ready for this.
♥ kP

35 Weeks!

Take a look at that bump!
Baby girl is definitely sticking out further and getting stronger by the minute.
She still seems to be on a very consistent schedule. Her most active time is 2-5pm and 8-11pm.
She is completely quiet all morning. If she keeps this up, she’ll fit in perfectly around here.
If not, we’ll adjust quickly.

I washed two HUGE loads of baby laundry this week. She. has. so. many. clothes.
We bought a dresser for the nursery, and I was so excited to have a few drawers for clothes that are falling out of my closet, but there is no space for me. Her stuff fills the entire thing. The entire thing.
Six huge drawers, you guys!

There sure is a lot of pink going on in her room. It’s so funny because I made such a big deal about how I didn’t want to be the mom that buys tons of pink stuff. I guess there’s something very compelling about the color pink and baby girls because I’ve fallen into the trap. I think I started caving when I found the diaper bag.  Motherhood is causing me to do and think a lot of cheesy things that I’ve always thought were ridiculous. I’m turning into a mom!! Help!

We went to the doctor this week, and, according to the doctor’s estimate, G weighs more than 6 pounds already. She’s not going to be underweight, that’s for sure. I love it.

I still have a feeling that she’s going to come early, which is causing me to lay very low these days. I think once I hit 37 weeks (full term), I’ll be able to relax a little bit, but I hope she comes later than that. Is this feeling just wishful thinking? Probably. ha!

(a pic for my mom, taken post-nap) 

No physical complaints this week. Such a blessing. I haven’t had a bad headache in WEEKS. It’s a miracle! Seriously. Such an answer to prayer. I’m still fairly comfortable. I don’t have any aches or pains, and I’m sleeping well. I know that’s not normal, so I’m soaking it up.

Every week as I type these posts, I always think, “wow! It’s already week____.” This week I had to keep double checking to make sure it’s really 35–it feels like it should be later. I guess I’m approaching that time in pregnancy when people feel “done.”

I’m ready to meet this girl!

♥ kP

Week 34: Only 5 More!

I really shouldn’t get my hopes up like that, but I just kinda feel like G’s going to come a week early.

We’ll see.


We don’t have access to English birth classes here in our city, so I have been watching an 80s video-converted-to-DVD. Super special. It definitely makes everything far less scary when you can look at mullets and pouffy bangs.

I’m trying to learn as many breathing techniques as I can, but I think I’m super dyslexic or something because the first time I tried I almost had an asthma attack. Embarrassing.

When I practice with Husband, we both just start laughing hysterically as I ask him over and over, “am I relaxed?” To which he replies: “I have no idea.” This is going to be interesting.

I told my mom, “I think I’m just going to end up laughing and laughing when I’m in labor.” Her response was awesome: “Um, no. That definitely won’t happen.”

I asked Husband if he would sing me Christmas carols while I’m in labor, but he said no. Sad! I’m not concerned, though. I’m sure when I’m in labor he’ll do whatever I ask him to. mwhaha.

Seriously, though, we’ve got to get this down. With all my health concerns, the doctor said what we already know: labor needs to be as short as possible. Obviously we can’t control the length, but hopefully being ready to face the pain and relaxing will help a little. Needless to say: pray for us!

My belly is so much bigger this week, which means: more stretch marks! The only maternity clothes I’ve been wearing are my maternity jeans. Everything else still fits. I might be stretching everything out completely, but it still fits. My favorite hoodie (above) is supposed to be a dress, so that helps a little. ha!

I’m glad she’s growing strong.

I’m love, love, loving this little hat and matching mittens. Eep!

I could open up a baby shop with all the stuff Nana’s been sending G. Seriously.
This girl is spoiled.
(and I love it).


Baby G’s hearing is excellent these days. She’s responding to sounds more and more, which is so cute. It makes all this feel even more real.

Yesterday she woke up when Papa burped, and then a few minutes later, when he was grinding coffee, I thought she was going to bust right through my stomach. She totally JUMPED. Poor girl. She’s got a noisy Papa 😉

Since she’s responding more to sounds, I decided it was finally time to buy some music for her. I want scripture songs because almost all the scripture I know I learned when I was a kid. And I think it’s really soothing to fall asleep to. I didn’t realize how hard it is to find kids music that isn’t terribly cheesy or annoying. Like You’re a V.I.P to G-O-D. Really, sir? Are you serious? I mean I listened to a lot of cheesy music when I was little, but seriously.

I could’ve just bought the Steve Green music I grew up with (anyone else?), but now that I listen it’s pretty annoying (plus I know all those songs by heart, so I can just sing ’em to her). I wanted something new.

So far these are my favorites: Scripture Lullabies and Scripture Songs for Families.

She likes them a lot. Or she really hates them. I can’t tell, but she moves a lot when I play them.

Now I just need to find some Korean songs.
(Papa, you’re slackin’).

We are getting more and more excited every day.
I can’t wait to hold her. And see her little face. ahhh!

♥ kP

33 Weeks!

33 Week Update:

Just kidding, guys. It makes me so sad that pregnant ladies obsess about this. It’s one of my pet peeves. “I accidently forgot to lather myself in body lotion last night! ahhh! My life is over!!!”

I did not take any preventative measures for two reasons:
1. When I was in 4th or 5th grade, I grew like 2 feet overnight. Ever seen a 5’8 5th grader? Yeah, that was me. I already have a body-full of vertical stretch marks, so i knew my skin was destined to collect more if given the chance (I have terrible skin, but it does its job, so I’m not complaining).
2. I hate, loathe, abhor, despise (and all other synonyms) lotion. Absolutely hate it. I can’t stand the feeling of being greased up, and I hate the smell. Even unscented lotion stinks to me. This goes along with my hatred for umbrellas, sunglasses, sunshields in the car, tinted windows, most perfume, anything on my face, and hats. I guess I don’t like anything that hinders my 5 senses. It’s a wonder I wear clothes! Just kidding. Clearly I have problems.

So….a few days ago, I checked under my belly (which is really hard to do these days!), and discovered a purple spot. Whoa! I thought to myself. She bruised the outside of my stomach! How is that possible? And then I realized…oh! It’s a stretch mark!

Later I announced to husband: I’m getting stretch marks.
Husband (in the most loving, genuine, almost excited voice): Good!
Me: What do you mean, ‘good’?
Husband: That means BP’s growing well!
Me: Will you still kiss me if I’m covered in stretch marks?
Husband (rolls his eyes at my ridiculousness): Of course!
Me: Ok, then, I don’t care.

I love his reaction to things. Instead of saying, “I’m sorry” or “that’s too bad”, he always sees the bigger picture: it means the baby’s growing! Every day he helps me focus on what really matters and forget the things that don’t matter at all. Makes me want to kiss him.

I guess these stretch marks will hold me accountable to my strong belief that moms should only wear one-piece swimsuits. For real. (at least this mama–no offense). I mean what kid wants their mom to walk around with their stomach hanging out? It’s a little awkward.

We had another ultrasound this week. I’m so in love with this girl. We could clearly see her (not so little) mouth and chubby lips. She kept opening her mouth wide like she was yawning. At one point, she stuck out her (super long) tongue. So cute you guys. The best part, though, was when the doctor kept saying, “she’s chewing something!” I was so confused. Chewing? Really? What kind of chunks are in there? And then I realized that she meant to say swallow. Awesome.

I love that she’s always moving. The other day my stomach leaped into the air, and Husband asked, “was that her?” Haha. Like I could make my stomach do that. Silly Papa.

This morning I told Husband, “let’s just tell everyone her name”, but he said no. Too bad. I’m on your side now, everyone. I’m getting sick of explaining that it’s a secret…for no reason. ha!

My older brother and sister in law sent these lovelies. BP’s (my) new favorite toy and blanket. Love! (Thanks so much, guys!)

One week closer! Hip hip hooray!

♥ k

32 Weeks!

Every week I feel like throwing a party. We’re getting closer!

We have been collecting a lot of baby stuff lately (thanks Mom!). I think we’re getting really close to having only diapers on the list of things we need before BP comes. Crazy! Why are strollers so crazy-expensive (it’s worse here in Korea)? Our friends recommended a $500 stroller. Uh no. Never in a million years would I spend that much on a stroller.

I’m definitely gaining candy weight. Awesome. I usually eat pretty healthy, so when I indulge in sugary treats (which, hello!, I should not be doing with all my blood sugar issues. but I want to), it just goes straight to my hips. Lovely. Hope my fat rolls aren’t squishing you, babe.

I have always thought is was so cheesy when parents put their  child’s name on everything (nursery wall, diaper bag, onesies, etc). I shouldn’t have been so judgmental because I’m starting to have the urge to do the same thing. Ahh! Don’t worry, I won’t, but the thought has crossed my mind several times.

I’ve decided to only read birth stories where the labor is really short. Those stories are much more exciting and empowering. All my friends here in Korea delivered their babies in less than 6 hours. I’m so confused because these girls are tiny. Maybe there’s some secret I’ll discover when I’m in the hospital. I’m also loving the stories about people who don’t have time to get to the hospital, so the dad has to deliver the baby at home. I definitely don’t wish that on Husband (he would do great, but he would be so stressed out), but it sounds kind of lovely to skip all the days of intensity. I’m hoping G comes quickly when she’s ready. I think that’s every pregnant woman’s wish.

Today while I was riding the subway, I had a very “mom” moment. There were a lot of people riding, and then when we got to a certain stop, most of them stood by the doors to get off. My thought, that I almost said out-loud, was “have a good day everybody!” haha.

My body is still feeling more and more comfortable the bigger I get. It’s the weirdest thing. I guess as my organs are all smashed into their new positions, my body is adjusting, and there’s not as much pain. Nice.

That’s it for this week.
I can’t believe we’re getting so close!


The Spiritual Side of Pregnancy

My mom and I were talking about how strange it is that no one ever mentions the spiritual aspect of bringing a baby into the world. I feel like there’s already a fight for her heart and mind and soul and body. As her mom, I’m on the front lines, praying and interceding for her. When I think about the fact that God has made her for His glory, it puts everything into perspective. It’s no wonder there’s a fight.

It makes me so mad when I think about how the enemy targets young kids with fears (usually of the dark) and nightmares. I want our house and our hearts and our minds to be places where the Spirit dwells, places of prayer, which means I’ve got to get in the habit of praying more often.

I’m not trying to be super-spiritual or hyper about this stuff, but I just feel the urge to pray for her. It’s not all cutesy baby thoughts and pre-washed onesies, folks. My heart and mind are suddenly aware of how much prayer it takes to get these little people here safe and sound. Maybe I’ve just turned a corner in my journey to full-on motherhood. It’s more intense than I imagined when I pictured myself cuddling a bundle of chub.

I’m so thankful for the promise that God is a shield around us. I’m thankful that He lifts our heads.

My theme song these days (I always seem to have one):

Come to Me by Jenn Johnson/Bethel Music on Grooveshark

♥ kP

The Nursery

One of the main things we’re praying for our daughter (squeal!) is that she would know truth. As a girl, especially, it’s so easy to get caught up in all kinds of lies. We are praying that she will not only recognize truth, but internalize it, share it, and walk in it.

I want her to be surrounded by truth from the beginning. One of the ways that I want to do that is by filling her mind with scripture.

Which reminds me of the classic story that’s been passed down from my grandfather. When my mom and her brother were little, someone commented that he was brainwashing them by teaching them about God and taking them to church. His response was perfect: “you bet! If we don’t brainwash them, someone else will.” Exactly.

I want her to overflow with the Truth from a young age.

I decided that I want her nursery to be filled with scripture, so I’m in the process of crafting some lovelies:

This verse (phil. 4:8) and Ephesians 6 (armor of God) are the two passages that I always come back to when I pray for her.

I was trying to find a poster or picture of a soldier to go with the armor of God, but I can’t find anything that isn’t cheesy. I’m being very picky. I want a picture of an ancient Korean (woman) soldier. No Chinese woman soldiers (there seem to be many), and no cheesy Roman soldiers. When I see Roman soldiers I think of VBS in the 90s. I want a Korean soldier.

Husband helped me find a computer generated picture of what the experts think an ancient 4th century woman soldier looked like. It’s amazing! And perfect! But it’s too small. I mean, if I had a choice, I would choose a life-size painting. I really wish I could draw or paint.

I am pretty good with scissors, so I whipped this up based on the picture we found (scroll to the very bottom):

I don’t like it. It’s too cutesy.
I did hang it up, though, until I come up with a better alternative.

Sometimes it makes me nervous when I think about raising a daughter. Especially in a culture that is completely obsessed with fashion and name brands and “beauty.” I want to protect her from all the peer pressure and stupid Jr. High drama (am I right, girls?). The best way I know is to fill her with the truth. Truth about who God is, who she is, and who God wants her to be.


30 Weeks!

It turns out self portraits aren’t my thing. Especially pregnant self portraits. I just can’t get a good pic…so week 30 includes an awkward pregnancy collage! Hip hip hooray!

I can’t believe that G is 30 weeks old today. Time is going by so, so, so fast (and so, so, so slow).

Today I put on my skinny jeans (bottom row above) and Husband, in all sincerity, love, and genuine concern, looked at me and asked, “Babe, are you going to be ok?” Ha! They’re getting a little tight ;).

My back has been sore because of the growing bump, and also because I have the worst posture ever. I was explaining it to Husband in a concerned voice, adding, “I’m not even that big yet!” He looked at me and assured me, “actually, you’re pretty big.” I know I’m big, but I’m only 30 weeks. I’m going to get much, much bigger. He then reminded me that G’s size is 2 weeks ahead of schedule. Then he sighed and prayed out loud, “Oh Jesus, please help her be able to deliver naturally.” Haha. She’s not that big! Or is she….?

Nana (my mom) and I decided that we’re going to buy most of G’s clothes after she’s born because we don’t know how big she’s going to be (the babies in my family plump immediately, wearing 12 month clothes at like 3 months). I talked to her the other day and she said, in a very guilty voice, “I accidently bought BP some more clothes.” Of course she did! She has no self-control when it comes to this babe. At all. Love her.

I can’t wait to post pics of her face instead of my oversized tum.

♥ kP